What Is a MIAM and Do I Really Need One Before Going to Court?

If you are separating or already separated and thinking about making an application to court about children or finances, you may have come across the term MIAM and wondered what it means – and whether you really have to do it.

MIAM stands for Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting. Despite the formal-sounding name, it is simply an individual meeting with a family mediator to:

• Explain what family mediation is

• Explore whether family mediation might be suitable for your situation

• And talk through your options for resolving matters without going to court, if possible

For many people, it is the first calm, clear conversation they have had about what to do next.

Why does the court want people to attend a MIAM?

In most cases, before you can apply to court about:

• Child arrangements, or

• Financial matters after separation or divorce

you are expected to at least consider family mediation first.

The reason for this is simple:
Court is stressful, slow, expensive, and often makes situations more conflict-driven rather than less. Many disputes can be resolved more quickly, more calmly, and more cheaply through family mediation.

The MIAM is designed to make sure that:

• You understand what family mediation is

• You understand what other options exist

• And you are making an informed decision about how to proceed

It is not about forcing anyone into family mediation.

Is the MIAM a joint meeting?

No. A MIAM is:

A private, one-to-one meeting between you and the mediator.

Each person has their own MIAM.

This means you can:

• Talk openly

• Ask questions

• Explain your concerns

• And explore your options in a safe, confidential space

Nothing discussed in your MIAM is shared with the other person without your permission.

What actually happens in a MIAM?

In your MIAM, we will usually cover:

• A brief outline of your situation

• What issues need to be resolved (for example, children, finances, or both)

• How family mediation works in practice

• Whether family mediation is likely to be suitable and safe in your circumstances

• What other options are available if family mediation is not appropriate

• And what the next steps might look like

Just as importantly, you can:

• Ask any questions you have

• Talk through your worries or uncertainties

• And get a clearer sense of what a realistic and proportionate way forward might be

Most people leave a MIAM feeling far less overwhelmed than when they arrived.

Does attending a MIAM mean I have to go into family mediation?

No.

Attending a MIAM does not commit you to family mediation.

It is:

A conversation about your options, not a binding decision.

Some people decide to proceed to family mediation.
Others may decide it is not right for them.
And some realise they need legal advice first.

Above all, the purpose of the MIAM is to help you make a properly informed choice.

Are there situations where I don’t need a MIAM?

Yes. There are certain exceptions, for example where:

• There has been domestic abuse

• There are urgent safeguarding concerns

• Or the application is genuinely urgent

These exceptions are defined by the court rules.

If you are unsure whether an exception applies to you, this can be discussed in your MIAM or when you make contact.

What if the other person refuses to come to family mediation?

That does happen sometimes.

If you have attended a MIAM and the other person:

• Refuses to attend, or

• Family Mediation is assessed as unsuitable

then the mediator can complete the relevant section of the court form to confirm that family mediation has been considered.

The key point is:

The court wants to see that mediation has at least been properly explored.

Is a MIAM just a “tick box exercise”?

It really shouldn’t be.

In my experience, for many people the MIAM is the first time they have had a clear explanation of:

• The process

• The likely costs

• The timescales

• And the realistic options available to them

Generally, even if family mediation does not go ahead, most people find the MIAM helpful in bringing some order to a very uncertain situation.

A calmer, more cost-effective starting point

As a family mediator and a non-practising solicitor, I have seen first-hand how quickly matters can become:

• More complicated

• More hostile

• And more expensive

than they ever needed to be.

I’ve written more about the financial comparison in this article on whether mediation is cheaper than using solicitors.

A MIAM is often the most sensible, proportionate first step – whether family mediation goes ahead or not.

If you are not sure what to do next

If you are separating and feel overwhelmed about children, finances, or the process itself, you do not have to work it all out alone.

A Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting or an initial consultation can help you:

• Understand your options

• Get clear about your next steps

• And decide on the best way forward for your particular situation

The first step to make an appointment for a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting is to complete our Participant Questionnaire.

TO START THE PROCESS, PLEASE CLICK THE BUTTON BELOW TO COMPLETE YOUR QUESTIONNAIRE – WE WILL THEN CONTACT YOU.